For the last several weeks, I have been under severe stress because of family problems. I am feeling trapped in a bad situation with no way out. It has now gotten to be depression. I’m tired all of the time, I cry a lot, and have unknown maladies, probably due to the stress.
Yesterday, my husband and I were at a shopping mall, sitting outside having coffee. I was of course, crying, and very unhappy, when I looked up, and on a branch very close and facing me, sat a beautiful blue bird chatting continually and appeared to be looking directly at me. He then flew over to a branch that was just over my shoulder - so close that if I raised my hand, I could touch him. He continued to chatter and look at me, for what seemed to be a very long time. He then flew down on the ground right next to me keeping up the same loud chatter. It was amazing and beautiful. The man sitting across from us stood up to watch. My husband was in disbelief. There were no other blue birds anywhere in the area. This one really made itself known to me. My husband and I talked about this for hours. My depression went away and I actually had a very nice day.
My husband and I both believe this bird came to me for a reason and with a message. I wondered if anyone out there could interpret this for me. Also could the bird be someone who has passed with a message. Also, I would love to know what the message was.
Julie
Thursday, February 21, 2008
A Strange Encounter
This is a follow up on Blue Bird which I wrote in September as a result of feeling great depression. Yesterday, my husband, my son, and I were sitting in the rear of our cafe and discussing our mutual problem—my son’s wife, who is the cause of this horrible situation we are all in and feeling trapped.
At that time a young girl came into the cafe, sat down next to us and began writing and working on her computer. We continued talking in a very quiet manner.We all stayed for about an hour. The girl then arose to leave. I smiled at her and she smiled back. Shortly, I noticed she left a hand written piece of paper on the table. Thinking it may be important, I grabbed it and ran after her. I looked all over. I then spotted a girl that resembled her about a half of a block away. I ran to her and called out, she turned, and it was not the same girl. She just disappeared. On my way back, I began reading the hand written letter.
On the very top of the paper was a musical scale, above it were the words “Please Read:”
"I don’t usually give notes to strangers, and please forgive the awkwardness, as I feel awkward myself. It may not make sense why I’m writing you this note, but things happen for a reason. I am not religious. So this is not to impose any religious belief, but I am compelled to give you this message which I honestly don’t know where it is coming from: One’s happiness cannot be found outside of oneself, the same goes for all emotions/feelings. What we experience on the outside comes from our experience happening on the inside. It may not make sense, but please try and understand the power thought has on our lives, our relationships and our well being. Whatever is inside is outside. Whatever is outside is inside, if you choose. Sometimes, one does not have the conscious power to make that choice, but everyone possesses the power of free will. And most are not aware or take advantage of the power to choose... it is more so taken for granted.
You see, I sit here writing...unaware of what the conversations are about because I am half deaf, and all on the side where you happen to be sitting. So, please don’t be alarmed, I did not hear any part of your conversations.
I have one last message:
Learn from the goodness of others as well as from your own. Love unselfishly and follow that golden rule ’til the end of your days. We all possess the power to do great things and make a difference, but it’s a conscious choice we must continually make on a daily basis, whether we are aware of it or not.
We come across individuals that we only see once in our entire lifetime, perhaps for a reason. As awkward as this seems for both of us...this message was intended to be found by you."
I am blown away by this occurrence. I believe this was another miracle. Please, please, if anyone has any interpretations for me, let me know.
At that time a young girl came into the cafe, sat down next to us and began writing and working on her computer. We continued talking in a very quiet manner.We all stayed for about an hour. The girl then arose to leave. I smiled at her and she smiled back. Shortly, I noticed she left a hand written piece of paper on the table. Thinking it may be important, I grabbed it and ran after her. I looked all over. I then spotted a girl that resembled her about a half of a block away. I ran to her and called out, she turned, and it was not the same girl. She just disappeared. On my way back, I began reading the hand written letter.
On the very top of the paper was a musical scale, above it were the words “Please Read:”
"I don’t usually give notes to strangers, and please forgive the awkwardness, as I feel awkward myself. It may not make sense why I’m writing you this note, but things happen for a reason. I am not religious. So this is not to impose any religious belief, but I am compelled to give you this message which I honestly don’t know where it is coming from: One’s happiness cannot be found outside of oneself, the same goes for all emotions/feelings. What we experience on the outside comes from our experience happening on the inside. It may not make sense, but please try and understand the power thought has on our lives, our relationships and our well being. Whatever is inside is outside. Whatever is outside is inside, if you choose. Sometimes, one does not have the conscious power to make that choice, but everyone possesses the power of free will. And most are not aware or take advantage of the power to choose... it is more so taken for granted.
You see, I sit here writing...unaware of what the conversations are about because I am half deaf, and all on the side where you happen to be sitting. So, please don’t be alarmed, I did not hear any part of your conversations.
I have one last message:
Learn from the goodness of others as well as from your own. Love unselfishly and follow that golden rule ’til the end of your days. We all possess the power to do great things and make a difference, but it’s a conscious choice we must continually make on a daily basis, whether we are aware of it or not.
We come across individuals that we only see once in our entire lifetime, perhaps for a reason. As awkward as this seems for both of us...this message was intended to be found by you."
I am blown away by this occurrence. I believe this was another miracle. Please, please, if anyone has any interpretations for me, let me know.
Saturday, February 2, 2008
Life Destroyed by adult children
It was October 1, and we were so excited. We were finally leaving to go to California to be with my son & his family. Tony and I have been anxiously awaiting this day for a year and a half. During this time, Jill would constantly call either Tony or me and say, when are you guys coming out, we need you. That took place at least once a week. We thought it would take us only 6 months to sell our homes and business and take care of loose ends, but the market was so bad just then that nothing was selling. So finally one and a half years later, we are on our way.
We invested in two coffee shops with my son and his wife. She was running them along with his help until we were able to come out. The first one, I invested in by myself while in Illinois, I never asked for any money because I was not there working. I wanted them to be comfortable and not worry about getting me any money. I knew that once I got out there, then all would be good.
The second shop we bought while there on one of our many trips & found it right on the Pier of the Pacific. I fell in love with it. We went back to Illinois and Phil and Jill took care of the sale. We sent them the closing costs & all of the money by wire transfer. We made out an agreement that we each would have 50% ownership in the shops. Phil would continue working at his job and Jill, Tony and I would run the shops. This would not be their primary source of income. Once we were here, we would then incorporate the shops, Tony would then take care of the accounting & books, with Jill's help. We were to change bank accounts and put Tony's name on the account. While still in Illinois, we made several trips to work in the shops. One of those trips was for Phil and Jill to go out of town. So we tended to the stores.
We arrived in California all excited and happy. Tony was thrilled to have finally found a “family.” He loved Phil, Jill and of course, Ricky. Being that Tony was not Phil's father, that was thrilling to me. Our first few months were absolute heaven. I tried to learn as much as I could with the stores doing the daily chores, and marketing them as much as I could. This was supposed to be my responsibility from the beginning. I made dinner for them almost every night so that they could save money and not have to go out to eat every day. We helped with Ricky, driving him to school, picking him up and taking him to all of his practices. Our life was very full and happy. However, we began to be concerned,because each time we brought up the idea of doing the things that we originally talked about with the business the subject was dropped or there was one excuse after the other as to why it could not be done.
Sometime in March, Tony tried to pin Phil down and ask when we would get to do the things we were to do with the business, and really make a stand at getting a salary for all the work we were doing. Phil said Jill was the one who refused to give us anything. She said we deserved nothing. It was impossible to even talk to Jill, so all of Tony’s efforts were with Phil. Each time he met with him, Phil would talk for hours about how bad Jill is, that she is lazy, doesn’t want to work, takes a nap every day, the house is a mess, he has to clean it and on and on. He again tried in April, May, June……… Each time the conversation went the same way. Phil condemned Jill for being the one holdout and refusing to cooperate. He continually complained on how horrible she was to live with and he probably should get a divorce. He tried to offer some compensation of money to us,like running a BBQ. He would run it and we could keep the profits. So reluctantly we accepted. It made us feel like hired help. Eventually, we ended up running the B_B_Q. However, Jill resented that very much and she made things extremely difficult. I was still doing my marketing for the stores and in doing so became pretty friendly with some of the city council members and other people in various Societies. My picture appeared in the paper on several occasions as the co-owner of the stores. This sent Jill into orbit. That is when she started her smear campaign against me. She talked against me to all of the employees and that made things very uncomfortable to even go inside my own stores.
The stress was becoming intolerable. Tony ended up in the hospital having open heart surgery. He was hospitalized for 6 weeks. Even then the attacks never stopped. Jill did not care about anyone but herself.
Jill assaulted me in a local restaurant and pub in front of many people that we were friendly with. She began screaming at me, at which time, Tony came by me and said let’s go. She would not let me leave. She grabbed my arm, at which time, Tony got in between us thinking she would hit me. She followed us to the car and grabbed hold of the window continuing to scream obscenities at me. Phil finally pushed her hard away from the car and we drove off. This was the third and worst incident between us where she viciously attacked me. Her arguments were all based on situations that I had while in Illinois 20 years earlier. However, they were very exagerated and seen from her misguided perspective. None of these things had anything to do with our contract and what was going on today. She accused me of giving them nothing during their marriage. That was a ball faced lie. Wheter I did or not also, is my business not hers. Besides, I gave them $40,000. downpayment on their home, another $20,000. for taxes they owed. All this while they were earning in excess of $200,000. per year.
I now believe, they decided the shops were theirs and we were intruders. They wanted them all to themselves, even though the agreement we made was in black and white, and we had more than 50% of the money invested. In the beginning, Phil was (or seemed to be) on our side. He even agreed to go to a counselor to try to straighten up this mess. The counselor told me that she does not believe I have anything to do with this problem. It is hers Jill'S and she is creating a triangle, pulling me into it, which is very common. I told the counselor of her house (never a home). It is complete chaos: there are rooms you cannot even walk into. Her accounting system for the stores consists of a 10 x 10 ft. area in the living room strewN with paper bags filled with money, receipts and file folders. The garage reeks with garbage; there is laundry all over the floor, it is both clean and soiled. If she needs something to wear, the clean and dirty clothes go back into the washer. Their son, who is 15 and an unbelievably great kid refuses to bring friends into the house. He stays out and is never home. The counselor told me the exterior is manifested from what lies within. We all believe she is a sick puppy. She had gorgeous, very expensive clothes which Phil bought for her: $1,000.00 suits, fabulous leathers, jewelry, etc.
They are all gone, either lost or ruined on the garage floor. THIS IS WHO IS RUNNING THE BUSINESS. They breached the contract. Not allowing us access to the accounting, not putting our name on any paperwork,, not incorporating the business, and above all, neither of them went to work. It was to be their second income not their primary one. Phil was to work in a position of very high income (much more than he could make at the stores).Now, we are paying for their lifestyle.
In the year and a half of our being out here, running around, doing chores and working very hard in the business, trying to negotiate terms with them as well as money, we have made no headway. We are young seniors who thought this would be a great way to keep busy as well as offer us some retirement income. We have tried every possible avenue without going into a lawsuit (which we would win). A lawsuit would only destroy the businesses as well as our lives, plus be extremely expensive (which we cannot afford)and time consuming. We have hired an attorney who is trying to negotiate with them, terms of a sale, so that they could buy us out, because we can no longer work under these adverse conditions. They have agreed to buy us out only if we financed the balance on a land contract, which our attorney advises against it because they could easily default. We have now lost our son,our grandson, our future and our retirement nest egg. Needless to say it has torn the hearts out of us. The days and nights that I have spent crying, depressed and literally ill are huge. We are both under doctor's care for depression, anxiety attacks, and stomach ailment due to the pressure and heartbreak of this awful situation. No matter how it ends, we will all lose.
If anyone can comment, offer advice, or give us another alternative for assistance we would be very grateful.
Tony & Julie
We invested in two coffee shops with my son and his wife. She was running them along with his help until we were able to come out. The first one, I invested in by myself while in Illinois, I never asked for any money because I was not there working. I wanted them to be comfortable and not worry about getting me any money. I knew that once I got out there, then all would be good.
The second shop we bought while there on one of our many trips & found it right on the Pier of the Pacific. I fell in love with it. We went back to Illinois and Phil and Jill took care of the sale. We sent them the closing costs & all of the money by wire transfer. We made out an agreement that we each would have 50% ownership in the shops. Phil would continue working at his job and Jill, Tony and I would run the shops. This would not be their primary source of income. Once we were here, we would then incorporate the shops, Tony would then take care of the accounting & books, with Jill's help. We were to change bank accounts and put Tony's name on the account. While still in Illinois, we made several trips to work in the shops. One of those trips was for Phil and Jill to go out of town. So we tended to the stores.
We arrived in California all excited and happy. Tony was thrilled to have finally found a “family.” He loved Phil, Jill and of course, Ricky. Being that Tony was not Phil's father, that was thrilling to me. Our first few months were absolute heaven. I tried to learn as much as I could with the stores doing the daily chores, and marketing them as much as I could. This was supposed to be my responsibility from the beginning. I made dinner for them almost every night so that they could save money and not have to go out to eat every day. We helped with Ricky, driving him to school, picking him up and taking him to all of his practices. Our life was very full and happy. However, we began to be concerned,because each time we brought up the idea of doing the things that we originally talked about with the business the subject was dropped or there was one excuse after the other as to why it could not be done.
Sometime in March, Tony tried to pin Phil down and ask when we would get to do the things we were to do with the business, and really make a stand at getting a salary for all the work we were doing. Phil said Jill was the one who refused to give us anything. She said we deserved nothing. It was impossible to even talk to Jill, so all of Tony’s efforts were with Phil. Each time he met with him, Phil would talk for hours about how bad Jill is, that she is lazy, doesn’t want to work, takes a nap every day, the house is a mess, he has to clean it and on and on. He again tried in April, May, June……… Each time the conversation went the same way. Phil condemned Jill for being the one holdout and refusing to cooperate. He continually complained on how horrible she was to live with and he probably should get a divorce. He tried to offer some compensation of money to us,like running a BBQ. He would run it and we could keep the profits. So reluctantly we accepted. It made us feel like hired help. Eventually, we ended up running the B_B_Q. However, Jill resented that very much and she made things extremely difficult. I was still doing my marketing for the stores and in doing so became pretty friendly with some of the city council members and other people in various Societies. My picture appeared in the paper on several occasions as the co-owner of the stores. This sent Jill into orbit. That is when she started her smear campaign against me. She talked against me to all of the employees and that made things very uncomfortable to even go inside my own stores.
The stress was becoming intolerable. Tony ended up in the hospital having open heart surgery. He was hospitalized for 6 weeks. Even then the attacks never stopped. Jill did not care about anyone but herself.
Jill assaulted me in a local restaurant and pub in front of many people that we were friendly with. She began screaming at me, at which time, Tony came by me and said let’s go. She would not let me leave. She grabbed my arm, at which time, Tony got in between us thinking she would hit me. She followed us to the car and grabbed hold of the window continuing to scream obscenities at me. Phil finally pushed her hard away from the car and we drove off. This was the third and worst incident between us where she viciously attacked me. Her arguments were all based on situations that I had while in Illinois 20 years earlier. However, they were very exagerated and seen from her misguided perspective. None of these things had anything to do with our contract and what was going on today. She accused me of giving them nothing during their marriage. That was a ball faced lie. Wheter I did or not also, is my business not hers. Besides, I gave them $40,000. downpayment on their home, another $20,000. for taxes they owed. All this while they were earning in excess of $200,000. per year.
I now believe, they decided the shops were theirs and we were intruders. They wanted them all to themselves, even though the agreement we made was in black and white, and we had more than 50% of the money invested. In the beginning, Phil was (or seemed to be) on our side. He even agreed to go to a counselor to try to straighten up this mess. The counselor told me that she does not believe I have anything to do with this problem. It is hers Jill'S and she is creating a triangle, pulling me into it, which is very common. I told the counselor of her house (never a home). It is complete chaos: there are rooms you cannot even walk into. Her accounting system for the stores consists of a 10 x 10 ft. area in the living room strewN with paper bags filled with money, receipts and file folders. The garage reeks with garbage; there is laundry all over the floor, it is both clean and soiled. If she needs something to wear, the clean and dirty clothes go back into the washer. Their son, who is 15 and an unbelievably great kid refuses to bring friends into the house. He stays out and is never home. The counselor told me the exterior is manifested from what lies within. We all believe she is a sick puppy. She had gorgeous, very expensive clothes which Phil bought for her: $1,000.00 suits, fabulous leathers, jewelry, etc.
They are all gone, either lost or ruined on the garage floor. THIS IS WHO IS RUNNING THE BUSINESS. They breached the contract. Not allowing us access to the accounting, not putting our name on any paperwork,, not incorporating the business, and above all, neither of them went to work. It was to be their second income not their primary one. Phil was to work in a position of very high income (much more than he could make at the stores).Now, we are paying for their lifestyle.
In the year and a half of our being out here, running around, doing chores and working very hard in the business, trying to negotiate terms with them as well as money, we have made no headway. We are young seniors who thought this would be a great way to keep busy as well as offer us some retirement income. We have tried every possible avenue without going into a lawsuit (which we would win). A lawsuit would only destroy the businesses as well as our lives, plus be extremely expensive (which we cannot afford)and time consuming. We have hired an attorney who is trying to negotiate with them, terms of a sale, so that they could buy us out, because we can no longer work under these adverse conditions. They have agreed to buy us out only if we financed the balance on a land contract, which our attorney advises against it because they could easily default. We have now lost our son,our grandson, our future and our retirement nest egg. Needless to say it has torn the hearts out of us. The days and nights that I have spent crying, depressed and literally ill are huge. We are both under doctor's care for depression, anxiety attacks, and stomach ailment due to the pressure and heartbreak of this awful situation. No matter how it ends, we will all lose.
If anyone can comment, offer advice, or give us another alternative for assistance we would be very grateful.
Tony & Julie
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)